Karate Party

If you ever have a reason to spend an afternoon with me, you will probably find out pretty quick that I am obsessed with karate. I don't like karate movies or watching karate on TV, I just like talking about karate. Personally I didn't even take karate because my mom thought that I did enough fighting already and she wasn't going to pay somebody to teach me how to fight more. It kind of sucked too because I had a trampoline in my back yard and I used to stay up at night thinking about how awesome it would be for karate fighting.

I don't know why I even like it or what makes it so cool but all I know is that I can't stop thinking about it. If I had to guess I would say it's because I have always liked kicking things. That is what I liked about soccer so much - kicking things on purpose. It's fun but after a while you start to wish you were kicking things you are not supposed to kick like asses and faces. That is what I am into kicking these days.

But karate is more than kicking, it's also about yelling and chopping and learning how to beat people up with ancient karate moves. It's a lot more complicated than it looks. Sometimes I think about learning karate on the internet but I never do it. Basically you have to start when you are little if you want to be able to karate. I was robbed of that chance.

These days I get pretty mad whenever I see the episode of Full House where Joey gets tough and bans DJ from being in a karate tournament because she comes home late. I know he had to put his foot down but it's just like what the heck you damn queer if she doesn't learn karate now you are basically keeping her from ever knowing it. DJ had worked so hard at karate and he was crushing her dreams.

I know a thing or two about having my dreams crushed by not being allowed to do karate and I can tell you that it stinks. Banning DJ from the karate tournament, are you kidding me?!? Gah you bozo those lessons cost money and karate gives pride to kids. There is no excuse for what you did Joey, none at all.

Man, I am so worked up right now that I don't even remember what happens about the karate tournament. All I know is that I don't know karate and I'm pissed about it. I never want another child to feel this kind of pain. Everyone should get to do karate.