Rival Blog!

Well it seems that I am not the only person who blogs about what Full House means to their life. Recently I found this entry from someone's blog. This is totally real by the way. Most of the crap I barf out on this blog is just made up but this isn't. So here goes:

Sunday, September 2, 2007

On the episode of "Full House" I just watched, D.J., (Candace Cameron) the oldest sister, bought a horse! It's name was Rocket and her best friend Kimmy Gibbler (Andrea Barber) helped her with the money. It costed 100 dollars per week for stable feed! That is a whole lot of money considering she had it for 2 weeks! I would never be able to pay that off! She kept it a secret from her dad (Bob Saget) for that long. Plus she lied about where she went after school. It never said what her punishment was, but she got in really big trouble. Trust me. I bet she couldn't watch T.V., use the phone, or have any friends over for a month at least! Considering her life, that must've been pretty harsh. The poor thing! At least she didn't get grounded in real life! That would've been so awful I would stay isolated in my room that whole time! Oh well.

The author describes herself in this way:

I am a pre-teenager that worships God. I was baptized when I was eight by my daddy. I have three siblings; Joey age 9, Abbie age 6, and Chloe age 4. My parents are Rob and Clarissa. I have participated in Music Mania once, and I am doing it again this year.

Can you believe this bullcrap? Who is this whore? Obviously this is some sort of rival masquerading as a religious child. Hiding behind God to throw me off. And what the balls is Music Mania? That isn't real. Psh.

No child could write a blog entry as brilliant as that. You would have to be plumb retarded to think those gorgeous words and enlightened insight came from some idiot kid. It's insulting really.

Here is how you can tell that it's a professional adult writer also. Look at how she said "it costed 100 dollars per week..." Nice try jerk! Making it seem cute and child-like is the number one red flag that it is not being written by a child but by a compensated adult. Not to mention the excess of exclamation points. Gah who do you think you are fooling?

Here is where you my loyal fanbase comes in. If you ever find a blog like this please tell me about it immediately. These are obviously professionals. Look at how they back-dated the blog to make it look like it was posted before my blog even existed. Man, these guys are good.

If you are reading this you "pre-teenager that worships God" then just know that I am on to you. Whoever hired you to take down my blog should just know that I will blog on toilet paper in a prison cell if it comes to that. You obviously have no idea who you're messing with.